i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
I am mentally ready for anal.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Randomize