the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
