walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You told me if you could get your shoes on, you deserved a coke and rum. We never made it to the party.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
