get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
