Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
