Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Randomize
