I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
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