just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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