hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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