Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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