grandma shit on top of the toilet
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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