Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
