Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
