We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
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