Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Randomize
