On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
