thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize