it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
