I bet he comes in French.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
