absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
