just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
