Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
