i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
