Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
