was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
it was like eating out sand paper
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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