I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
