you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Randomize
