I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
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