I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
it hurts more in the daytime
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
