my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize