I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Btw, remind me to tell you about how I had to cancel my crazy wild sex plans with Will b/c my roommate came back from his trip after a day b/c Canada wouldn't let him in. Fucking cockblock.
Actually that's the whole story. You don't have to remind me.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
