Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
