We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize