he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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