I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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