i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
Randomize
