I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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