let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize