I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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