I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Randomize
