The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I passed out drunk and Jane had created a picnic on my chest. I had chips and a hamburger laid out on my boobs. The only reason I woke up is she was trying to feed me too.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
