Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize