My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
