At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
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