I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
