Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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