Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
you tried to scramble eggs in my dryer last night. i want you here in 15 minutes to clean this shit up
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
Randomize
