Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
