birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
He's a Shit stain on my heart
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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