loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Randomize
