Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Currently trying to figure out if the guy has a cane next to me or brought a weird dildo to the bar
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Randomize
