At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize