Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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