yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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